I’m not the first woman who struggles to see you in grief, Lord. I cry out in my pain because I don’t know where you are. Mary Magdalene couldn’t recognize you when you were right in front of her, for she thought you were a gardener. So many times I have begged for someone to help me find you, but you have been with me all along. You call out my name. I know your voice because I follow after you. You are always with me, and no one can snatch me away.
I am hard pressed on every side, but not crushed. I am confused, but not in despair. I know what it is to be oppressed, but not abandoned. I have been struck down, but not destroyed. I am unworthy and broken, for that is why you placed a precious treasure inside of me. There is not much left of me, Lord. I am broken pieces and have nothing but you. Your grace remains sufficient. I could not be perfect even if I tried. Your power is perfect and rests upon me.
I will persist in asking for your help, Lord. I am an outsider and unwanted, but please don’t reject me forever. Have mercy on me, Lord; my family is in need. Please grant me the great faith of the Canaanite Woman. You hold all the power. I may not be perfect, but my voice matters to you. Test my heart and see if there is any grievous way in me and by grace lead me in the way everlasting.
I have wept for years for my children and cannot be comforted. I have given my life to raise them as unto you, Lord. Keep my voice from weeping, and my eyes from tears. Please reward these years of work and provide my children with a hope and a future.
My grief has blinded me, but I know you are near. Don’t pass me by! I will keep crying out for you to have mercy on me! The more they try to silence me, the louder my cry for your mercy will be. I am waiting for you to call me near. Lord, enlighten my eyes so I can see you again. Give me faith to see you in my grief.
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