Abba Father! Why do you overlook my pleas for help? Why must you leave me alone in this life without purpose? Father, I cry out in the dark, but you delay illuminating my darkness, and in the heartache, you multiply my sorrow.
Yet you are El Roi, the God who sees. You find women weeping in the wilderness. You listen to their afflictions and show them the way they should go. You come close to the outcast and abandoned, giving hidden treasure in darkness, riches stored in secret places so I may know you are my Lord.
I have nothing to offer you, Lord. All my attempts to love you could never be enough. Everyone tells me I am not walking in your way. They say, “You should do this! You should do that! If you trusted the Lord, why are you so anxious? Why would you despair?”
Yet you keep track of all my sorrows, collecting all my teardrops in your bottle. You record each in your book and understand the tangled emotions of my broken heart.
Please be with me, for I don’t know what to do, and no one will guide me but you, Lord. I am powerless against all that is charging at me. There is no one to defend me, but my eyes are on you, Lord. I will not be afraid or dismayed because you will fight for me. Help me stand firm and hold my position. I will wait and see that you will come through.
Father, I wish I had costly oil that I could pour over your head. I have nothing, but if I did, Lord, I would give it all to you. You defended the woman who gave all. When others called her foolish, you told them to leave her alone.
Lord, the only comfort in life you took from me. Song comforted me in the night, but you removed all comforts. I can only sing silently in my heart and sing to you with my tears. My lips now move, and no words come out. I am troubled in spirit. I am brokenhearted and pouring my heart out before you. They ask, “What is wrong with this woman with all these tears?”
“Oh, God of hosts, if you will indeed look upon the affliction of your servant and remember me and not forget your servant, but give to your servant what I desire most, then I will give it up to you every day of my life.”
I am desperately in need of you, Lord. No one can help me but you. I have used all my earthly resources, and there is no relief. I cry, “If I touch even your garments, I will be made well.” My suffering and embarrassment are before all. Why won’t you turn around? I’ve been tugging at your tassels for years. When will you call me daughter?
How abundant is the goodness you have stored up for those who fear and take refuge in you. My lips will praise you because your steadfast love is better than life. Because you have been my help, I will sing under the shadow of your wings. I will be glad in your steadfast love because you have seen my affliction.
You are my strong tower. I run to you, and I am safe. You are a shield for me, my glory, and the one who daily lifts my head. I can lie down and sleep for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety. You never slumber or sleep.
Why, O Lord, do you stand far away? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble? Please, Lord, answer me when I call. Be gracious to me and hear my prayer! You say you will answer before I cry out, and while I am still speaking, you hear me.
I am waiting and watching for you, Lord. Come closer and hear my cry. I am weary from crying out. I even looked for comforters, but I found none. The darkness makes me unable to see a path forward, but you say you will lead through unfamiliar paths, turn the darkness ahead to light, and smooth the rough places. You promise not to forsake me. Please don’t break your promise to me!
You are my rock of refuge to which I continually come. Don’t cast me out! I will hope continually and praise you yet more and more. Hold me all my days, and please never forsake me.
You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it. Even my darkness is not dark to you, for it is as the day. There is never a moment you don’t see me.
Father, nothing will be impossible with you. I am afraid and wish you could fulfill your purposes in a different way. Help me live the life you have given me. “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.”
I may sorrow, but only for a little while. The day will soon come when my heart will rejoice with you, and no one can take it from me. Until that day, I will listen to your voice beside and behind me, “This is the way; walk in it.”
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